First, after weeks of monitoring the election prediction sites, I want to point out that we can throw away all the polls, and not bother voting, because it’s all settled. Per the Washington Redskins, John Kerry is absolutely, positively guaranteed to win the election. As everyone who hasn’t been hiding under a rock knows by now, for the last 17 Presidential elections the outcome of the Redskins’ last game before the election has predicted the Presidential winner. If they win, the incumbent wins; if they lose, the incumbent loses. So, today they lost to the Green Bay Packers 28-14. Thus, Kerry wins. Absolutely, positively, 100% guaranteed. 😉
(After all, there are no [Red Sox] 80+ year traditions that have been [Red Sox] broken lately. Nope, none at all. Really. Why, it’s as likely as the Red Sox winning the World Series…[grin])
However, that’s not the interesting part. The interesting part is the description of the game:
LANDOVER, Md. (AP) — Clinton Portis celebrated the apparent winning touchdown with a leap into the end zone, capping a 43-yard reception that gave the Redskins a one-point lead with 2:35 to play.
Oops. Scratch that. Flag on the play.
Receiver James Thrash was whistled for illegal motion, a call Thrash didn’t understand and one that Washington coach Joe Gibbs called “an absolute mystery.”
The Green Bay Packers had a different feeling: sheer relief.
Al Harris intercepted a pass on the next play, and the Packers drove for an insurance touchdown to cap a 28-14 victory Sunday that pulled Green Bay (4-4) back to .500 after a 1-4 start.
But the play everyone will remember is the negated touchdown.
“I was exhausted,” Washington tackle Chris Samuels said. “I was chasing Clinton all over the field after we scored the touchdown trying to hug him. I was like, ‘Slow down, man. I’m trying to celebrate with you.’ Then, I turned around and saw the officials calling us back. It’s just disappointing. It’s tough.”
Based on the game, I predict an apparent Bush win, followed by a legal challenge by the Kerry campaign, and a judicial review awarding the win to Kerry on some inscrutable Republican election foul. Nostradamus hath spoken, via the Washington Redskins.
(Hey. Weirder things have happened. 😉 )
On the other hand, given that the Red Sox just won their first World Series in 86 years, under a blood-red moon (full lunar eclipse), and The Economist, capitalist magazine extraordinaire, just endorsed John Kerry, I think it’s pretty clear that Armageddon is on its way. So the outcome of the Presidential election may not matter. Perhaps Nader will win, upon which we’ll all be caught up in the Rapture. Prepare, prepare, the end is near!!
(Hey, it’s possible. [grin])
Meanwhile, I biked to work today! I was going to go off on my usual cycling run, but then it occured to me that hey! I can bike to work now!! because I’m working!!!!! so of course I had to go and scout out routes. Unfortunately, work is on the opposite side of a major freeway (the 101), which does limit my options, but with patience and perseverance I have successfully located at least three, equally good, routes to work. Unfortunately, they all have the same drawback. I appear to have a choice between:
(1) getting run over in a sea of freeway merges while crossing the 101 at Willow;
(2) getting run over ” ” ” ” ” while crossing the 101 at Marsh;
(3) getting run over ” ” ” ” ” while crossing the 101 at 84.
(That last one is truly terrifying–merging through two consecutive freeway-only lanes, immediately followed by a high-speed merge with cars getting off the freeway. I was sweating bullets crossing it on a sleepy Sunday afternoon–no WAY am I getting anywhere NEAR it during Monday rush hour.)
Fortunately I ran into some cyclists who pointed me at another alternate route, which apparently does not involve getting run over :-), so I’m going to scout it out next weekend. (It takes a freeway overpass that is *not* a freeway exit.) I think it will take considerably longer than the three options I tried today–all of which take about half an hour–but I figure that, by skipping the ambulance, trip to the emergency room, reconstructive surgery, and the year of physical therapy, it probably comes out considerably faster. [impish grin]
Meanwhile, I’m making progress on my sample chapter, which is a damn good thing since I have to get it (or at least seven pages of it) done for review for my writing class tomorrow evening. 🙂